After the 2020 election, I did what every sane person should do: clear out negativity. I removed the folks on both the left and the right who were singularly obsessed with politics from my social media feeds. Then, I took another step for my sanity: I stopped following the “fake perfectionists.”
Who are the “fake perfectionists?” You probably know them. They’re the folks who post photos and videos of their animals performing flawlessly, never showing a single misstep. They highlight their animal’s beauty, grace, and perfection as if their horses or mules were born knowing how to pack or side pass.
To which I say: Bye.
The Reality of Training
Training horses and mules is about mistakes. In fact, a successful training session is one where the mistakes were fewer than usual. Horses, mules, and people all have off days. Cues get missed. A session doesn’t go as planned. If you aren’t experiencing moments of frustration—or flat-out failure—you’re not training; you’re posing for the camera.
Lessons Learned: Water Crossings
2020 also included one of my most discouraging days in years. I was working with my new mule, Cocoa Bean, on water crossings, something I thought we’d been working on for weeks. We were at Washington State’s Haney Meadow on Cocoa’s first camping trip—a precursor to her first pack trip in just a few weeks.
The first attempt at a stream crossing ended with her jerking back and yanking the lead rope from my hand. Then she refused to stand quietly, again pulling the lead and bolting away. By the end of the ride, I had two key realizations:
1. Don’t shoot for perfect until the basics are solid. If the animal isn’t comfortable standing in water, there’s no point in perfecting the approach to the stream. You’re wasting effort if the animal isn’t mentally ready for the next step.
2. Break it down further. My method for introducing pressure and release was too slow. I needed to simplify the process and set her up for success.
These realizations forced me to step back and rethink my approach.
Refining the Process
On our next trip from camp, I focused entirely on building Cocoa’s confidence before we even reached the water. My plan was to move slowly and deliberately. Yet, when I stepped up her training, my timing was off, and she blew through the pressure again. By the end of the day, I had a frayed lead, a bruised ego, and one very confused mule.
This is typical when working with a new horse or refining a technique. One of my favorite sayings is, “Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast.” Yet, when I push forward without proper groundwork, there’s a good chance I’ll end up eating dirt—sometimes literally.
Calling It Good (for Now)
After we got home, I was determined to address the water crossing issue. I even built a water obstacle in the yard, telling myself the next ride would be flawless. Ha! If I’ve learned anything about working with horses and mules, it’s that the “perfect” ride is often just a slightly better version of the last one.
When I headed to the barn, Cocoa was waiting at the gate—a good sign. I assumed she’d refuse the water again, but to my surprise, she followed me with curiosity. We worked on groundwork, and with consistent cues and patience, she finally put one hoof in the water. Then two. Then four.
By the day’s end, we were still far from perfect but closer. Cocoa was walking through the water, with some hesitation but without bolting. Progress.
The Beauty of Imperfection
To make real progress with Cocoa, I had to go back to basics. I stripped my process down to the core principles of pressure and release, taking it one step at a time. I focused on building her confidence rather than forcing results.
Through trial and error, I’ve learned that horse and mule training, like most things, is a dance between structure and flexibility. You try, you fail, and you adjust. Over time, the mistakes become less frequent, and the results begin to shine.
The beauty of training isn’t in perfection—it’s in the process. It’s in the moments when you and your mule work through challenges together and come out stronger on the other side.
So, here’s to the next iteration and a better partnership with your horse or mule. Each step forward is built on the lessons of the steps before it.
For more tips, stories, and resources on trail riding and camping with horses and mules, visit us at TrailMeister.com, the world’s largest guide to horse trails and camps, or connect with us on social media. You can also get a copy of The ABCs of Trail Riding and Horse Camping from amazon – https://www.amazon.com/ABCs-Trail-Riding-Horse-Camping/dp/1737931508/